The Kind of Tribe I Write About: An Interview with Mallory Smart of Maudlin House

Mallory Smart is a Chicago-based writer, editor-in-chief of Maudlin House, and doer of many other things. She is the author of I Keep My Visions To Myself (With An X Books) and The Only Living Girl In Chicago (Trident Press). She is the host of two podcasts: Textual Healing and That Horror Cast. Recently, Mallory was kind enough to chat with Metapsychosis contributor Chase Griffin about running a literary magazine and publishing house, the life and responsibilities of the writer, and works in progress.

Chase

Can you tell me about I Keep My Visions To Myself?

Mallory 

I can say the quick plot and how it’s about a 26-year-old musician on the brink of being a celebrity all while confronting the age-old dilemma of fame versus the safety of a simpler existence, all while searching for her elusive tribe. But I’d rather talk about why I wrote it and what it means to me.

I’m afraid. I’m afraid that I’m losing myself bit by bit whenever I put something I create into the world. It’s like blindly handing over part of your identity. I started thinking back on why I write and how I got here. How I spend so much of my days treating my art like a product and my personality as a brand. The weirdness of having to censor my own thoughts and feelings. I was always creative. But the thought that my small ideas would someday become commitments never occured to me when I was younger. When I first began truly writing, I was hanging on a curbside of a Denny’s parking lot almost nightly with other dorks. None of those people ended up in this world, because we were just sharing parts of ourselves with other dorks. There was no transaction to what we did. We felt almost like a family or a tribe. I’m not truly nostalgic of that time in my life, but it is something that crosses my mind occasionally. It’s my origin story. It’s when I subconsciously made the choice to drift away from my tribe.

I wanted to write that story. Not about the ultimate decision that the main character chooses, but about the emotions that come with that dilemma. Tribes are so essential to how we grow as humans, but ambition has that fickle way of fracturing them.

Chase 

What’s it like running Maudlin House?

Mallory 

It’s like running around taking care of a gaggle of adorable cats. I always do my best to be as patient as possible in order to earn the trust of the writers but I also keep an eye out for any hilarious chaos that might come out of nowhere. It’s a fragile balance based on routine to maintain everyone’s mental health and being prepared to face weird mishaps that can ensue. But even when the chaos and mishaps come for me, I always love them because they’re amazing. If they weren’t, I probably would’ve thrown in the towel years ago.

Maudlin House has now been running for 10 years. I’ve had panic attacks, travelled to readings on no sleep, and had one mental breakdown that made me almost stop completely. But I can’t stop, because of the moments where I feel sheer joy. I’m a weirdo and dork. It seems like most of us are and that’s an amazing feeling that I’m addicted to. Even when it’s bad for me. Sometimes writers forget that I’m a human being and have flaws. The ones that don’t make it worth it, though. They’re my tribe. The kind of tribe that I write about in I Keep My Visions To Myself.

Chase 

What is fiction to you?

Mallory 

A meaningless genre that was just created to force a person’s ideas into a box. Everything we create has some fictional element to it. Even when people write autobiographies or academic texts, they are inserting themselves into the narrative. We get indulgent when we discuss ourselves or events in history. I’ve written poetry, fiction, and even academic articles for a fellowship I did. Each “genre” was riddled with my biased ideas and the way that I write. Discussing this almost makes me wonder if “truth” actually exists. If it does, I’m not sure many humans have experienced it and it might be something we haven’t discovered yet. Subjectively a person can say it does.

Gödel believed “truth” existed independently of our knowledge or ability to prove it. I think if we don’t have the ability to prove that “truth” exists, we don’t have the authority to say what “fiction” or “nonfiction” is. But I suppose the easiest way for me to define “fiction” would simply be that it’s a genre in which you are purposely thinking outside the box and are abandoning the idea of writing something concrete.

Chase 

Does the author have any responsibilities? If so, what are they?

Mallory 

Of course! It’s your baby. No one knows your work better than you. Yes, publishers and agents have a job. But that job is to hype it and make money. It’s an author’s responsibility to make sure that it gets in the right hands and is as fleshed out as humanly possible. Editors will help you, but only you know exactly what you want to say. An author should also be committed to helping promote the book. If they don’t, they give off the vibe that they don’t even believe in their own work. And if they don’t believe in it, why should they expect a publisher or agent to believe in it? I understand the feeling of anxiety when releasing something. I am always nervous about putting myself out there and have terrible stage fright. But I just don’t think it’s fair to expect a publisher to do it all themselves. If an author is shy or anxious, come up with other ways to help. But they do need to help.

Chase 

Are you working on a new book? Do you like talking about your WIPs?

Mallory 

I’m actually working on a few ideas. Two novels to be specific. I don’t like going into detail about them though. It comes back to the feeling of vulnerability when I write. It’s easier to talk about something that is complete.